"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness,
and all these things will be given to you as well."
Matthew 6:33

God reminded me today that I am His chosen one.
He refreshed my perspective of my responsibility and identity in being His Child.

Ought to fulfill my role as His Child first. That's the fundamental.

Probably some might have guessed, that I am working through yet another night for tomorrow's studio. Terrible, I just dislike working through the night and not having proper rest.

I don't feel like working and rushing for another interim, that's why I have decided to write something on this long neglected blog. I'm left with 15 days away from submission. I am more anxious, fearful, unmotivated... it's nightmare for the next 2 weeks to pull through a design which is merely 50% developed. Tutor never seem to understand or remember that submission is two weeks away. Feeling stressed from the demands of tutor and submission requirements. I know Dearest wouldn't like to hear this. But, sometimes.. I can't help. This is what goes through my mind... I pray to be more positive.. I pray to keep my eyes on Him alone and not on the impossibility of the impending deadline.

I pray for strength from God.. mental strength, emotional strength, and physical strength. I pray to go through another arduous journey with joy and not depressing lies from Satan.

Friends, please keep me in prayers. It's yet another battle.

God help me.
I pray to finish well.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers. whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

James 1:2-5

Updates

Spent the whole day in my room, trying my best to work on my design and hoping that I could be heading somewhere with my multiple trials.... I must admit, I feel that my design is still very much lacking.... lacking of depth... lacking of interest.

Sometimes, it's not that I don't like what I do. My non-aki friend used to comment on my overnighters when i told her that I just have to work overnight. She says rather honestly... that I didn't like what I was doing and therefore I procrastinated. I felt terribly wronged

Felt frustrated with design sometimes. Tried very hard, worked very hard.. My loved ones could attest for that...But, I just don't hit the nail. Sometimes, I feel like resigning because I think I am not cut out to be an designer...

I dislike the feeling of working so hard, yet still feel aimless because.. I don't know how I am designing.. Guess you won't understand... It's all very abstract.

I feel deprived. Deprived of a carefree lifestyle.. and heavily burdened by design and the impending submission date which I terribly fear. I am afraid that I can't finish in time to submit. I hate those days leading up to my submission, it's always so tiring.... and I always run out of steam..

Pls pray along with me. Pray for a great development and improvement in my design which is hardly 20% developed. Pray for restedness in my soul and encouraging spirit to keep me moving with this ardous journey that seems almost impossible to finish. Pray for stronger trust and reliance on my Abba Father who is a God of miracle and who can make the humanly impossible tasks possible.. Pray for me.. to be joyful and rested.. to be able to finish this project on time... and to pass so that I can graduate... Pray that I will praise Him all the days of my life.. and honour Him as I worship Him with my work.

Once again, God reminded me that when I can't, my God is able. God can.

I'm glad that I've spent my last two hours before I sleep watching a movie. =)
Faith, you ought to chill out a bit...
Good night dear friends....

"Surely goodness and love will follow all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of my Lord forever."